Cake & Eat It Day

At last, we have a specific attribution for the day after Halloween, other than ‘thank god that doesn’t come around again for another year!‘ Today may also just as easily be known as ‘Rather Die in a Ditch Day‘, as proclaimed amongst the mountain of porky’s prodigously served up by the rather porcine UK ‘Liar in Chief‘ (aka Trump Minor).

Until we speak again, I’m sure the tousled tosser will be banging on about getting cake both had and eaten. But don’t choke on the sweet stuff, and, by the way, does anyone know where said ditch is located? The ‘will of the people‘ are in need of a shrine to commemorate their glorious victory over those who no longer count (as democracy is now an event not a process).Difficult choicesPerhaps it can be named ‘Gullible Hollow‘. Thus serving a dual purpose of attracting the many stalwart pilgrims who bought into the lies ‘in the complete knowledge that they were doing so‘; as well as offering a suitable reflection of the depth of substance their great cheerleader exudes in the form of froth and bluster.

An American Dream

Once upon a time a young Donald developed an eye for the birds and an ability to stalk and hunt down any prey he cast his gaze upon…

He quickly decided he was unlikely to need any advice from New Orleans, however well intentioned…

But the idea of being the big chief seemed to his juvenile nihilism to be inevitable, and that he would undoubtedly become the biggest most colourful of all…

Alas, all he could truly manage in the eyes of sane people was to become a lizard, loved only by the abundant pond life he sought to mesmerise…

He quickly developed a narrow view of the company he wished to keep…

Unlike the Donald, if you come to New Orleans with an open mind and a true heart, a simple message will prevail…

Until we speak again, if you hold out a hand of support for something that tweets incessantly, what you may get in return is more guano than you can handle!

Brexit made simple

First there was a hard Brexit

Seagull on binstore

But where exactly has that one gone?

Cat at start

Then there was a soft Brexit

Squirrell [3]

Which is proving to be just as elusive…

cat at corner

So, just when everything appears to be going arse over tit…

Swans face down

… look for Juno or Bella when you need an answer?

Looking to Juno

Plotting an escape

Until we speak again, Juno reckons it will  be a hard fought draw, going to penalties… which the Germans always win!

The Gas Man

Some people thrive on hot air and gas, but few promote it in bright lights. Everything below the name is multi-storey car parking!

Until we speak again, while you are in Chicago (or anywhere else) try to stay above the twit guano.

Mugwump logic

I thought a mugwump was somebody independent of politics, or if you look at US literature it’s a Native American reference to a leader. So, thanks to the peroxide poser in the Foreign Office, the fashion for political soundbites leaves us with more heat than light.

White cat blue eyes

Careful who you’re calling a peroxide poser! I’ve got your bluebirds in my sight.

The current reference is prefaced with ‘mutton-headed’ and directed at the so-called leadership of the Labour Party. And, on the back of such confidence, the leader of the expected all-conquering English Tories heads into the Labour heartlands of Wales, gunning to take a Tory victory for the first time in 100 years or more. Political skies are looking grey wherever Labour supporters look…

Gloomy skies

But, surely the king mugwump isn’t going to lose one of his few remaining heartlands? This is Wales we are talking about. They don’t play Men of Harlech before each home match at the Cardiff City Stadium for nothing… with it’s line of ‘Welshmen never yield’ there is a strong message to any English insurgents.

Which brings me to the last home match of the season, as the marauding Geordies of Newcastle bring the largest away contingent… Magpies nesting at the home of the Bluebirds! Talking of peroxide posers… Newcastle United playing in anything other than their famous black and white stripes is unbelievable; but surely any mugwumps in blue are ready to repel the English confidence…

City v Newcastle

They might have already been promoted to the Premier League, but a Newcastle contingent in a mood to party were hardly going to obey the script of defiance writ large in the Welsh heartlands, were they? Well if you’re Jeremy Corbyn, or any of the faceless Labour wonders in Cardiff Bay, don’t look at the final score [Cardiff City 0 Newcastle United 2].

Until we speak again, if this match was prescient, then Juno exemplifies what the Welsh Labour stronghold has to offer in the coming General Election.

Playing dead

Searching for credible alternatives

With local elections just around the corner, credible alternatives to a noxious Tory controlled government are becoming difficult to find. The Labour Party are about as credible as an alternative design to those urine-stained lifts in so many tower blocks…

Students lift?

As for Plaid Cymru... they might well see themselves as a smooth alternative to the Scotch whisky market, but offer little credibility in the independence stakes when compared to the rampant Scottish Nationalist Party

Welsh Whisky

And the Liberal Democrats, well they are still trying to work out how they got decimated in the last General Election…

Difficult choices

The UKIP fraternity are coming to terms with weekly losses of so-called prominent representatives, as well the machinations of their new leader…

Bartley

Which leaves the earnestness of the Green Party, committed as they are to limiting the number of wheels polluting the environment, they never quite seem to get their full message properly coordinated…

Bikes on pitch

Meanwhile, down at the Cardiff City Stadium a credible alternative has emerged from the team that in October 2016 was languishing at the bottom of the Championship table. Cue the time for totally unreasonable expectations for next season…

City 1 Forest 0

Until we speak again, Bella offers no particular enlightenment regarding credible alternatives from the broadsheets. With expected turnouts to be nearer 20% in many places, it seems that most people probably don’t give a urine-stained lift for any alternative…

Reading paper and books

Cats swallowing wasps

We seem to be living in the age of outrage. But do we really need a new universal amendment to assert our right to be offended? The slightest hint of challenge or disagreement leaves too many people looking like they have swallowed a wasp. Take the so-called leader of the Western World… yes… please… go ahead and take him! He seems to have elevated wasp swallowing into a nocturnal pastime, with a blue-tinged cat snack as his vehicle of choice…

Donald Trump

Then, a little closer to home, when we are in desperate need for a credible opposition in Britain, what do we get? What do you think about Brexit Jeremy? What do you think about the future of the economy Jeremy? Who are the voters you actually need to get you  within a Gnat’s testicle of being able to do something Jeremy? It seems that wasp swallowing is a universal affliction of our so-called leaders…

corbyn

Talking of leadership and the intrusion of hymenoptera (well, weren’t we?). Just the other day, down at the home of football, the Cardiff City Stadium, manager Neil Warnock is reported to have had cause at half-time to employ his own particular brand of wasp swallowing

Neil Warnock

Many a player has had cause to experience the half-time verbal tongue lashing from Sheffield’s finest. On this occasion, the swallowing of wasps was employed as a means of devouring bees… the bees of Brentford FC, that is. For the record, at half time it was Cardiff City 0 Brentford 1; and at full time the score is Cardiff City 2 Brentford 1. Bees well and truly devoured!

As for Juno and Bella, one good thing about being indoor cats was the lesser chance of being tempted to supplement the meagre rations by chasing wasps, as you never know what the impact of success might be…

 

maxresdefault

[With acknowledgements to YouTube, BBC and the Independent for original images].